Say Haallow to the HaaHoos

In the second of our in-depth profiles of night gardenites we meet the always enigmatic and often surprising HaaHoos.

A walk among HaaHoos is a walk among gentle giants. They bounce, sway, and smile at our crew as we make our way toward their leader, HaaHoo X, who has agreed to give The Daily readers an inside look at HaaHoo life. The first thing people should know about the HaaHoos, says X, is that their well known cry of 'HaaHoo' does not mean 'hello' as many have supposed. 'No, it's part of a complex mating ritual,' he states, but he refuses to be drawn into specifics.'You really don't want to know,' he says, leading us toward the rest of the group.

The HaaHoos. Clockwise from rear left: Oval, Flower, Figure Eight (known affectionately as 'Beany'), X and Star.

The HaaHoos have no specific home in the garden, although they tend to spend most of their time near the Gazebo. 'We feel most comfortable here,' says X, 'The Gazebo has taken an interest in our culture and has even developed a series of lectures for interested residents' (see our Community Notices page for more information). While introducing us to the other HaaHoos, X enumerates some of their many accomplishments and talents. HaaHoo Flower apparently runs a very profitable internet dating website, HaaHoo Star is one of the world's leading experts on the bottle-nosed dolphin, and HaaHoo Figure Eight once bounced for the Queen. These surprising achievements belie the seemingly quiet life that the  HaaHoos have in the night garden, with the majority of excitement coming when residents wave to them from the Pinky-Ponk or the Ninky-Nonk decides to play a game of 'chicken'.

It is just this 'fairly boring' image that the HaaHoos want to change, says X. 'We've lived here for many years, and have yet to really feel accepted as fellow residents. We feel like we are seen as large pillows, or plump garden statues- nice to have around but hardly likely to be included in any meaningful way in adventures and so forth,' he rants. The other HaaHoos agree that they feel 'under-utilised and under-appreciated' in the garden.

A key problem, the HaaHoos feel, is that there is no place for them on the garden transport systems. Thus, they can't go for hair-raising rides on the Ninky-Nonk or share the joys of hitting a tree or bush in the Pinky-Ponk. They plan to lobby the transport minister to change this. We ask how the HaaHoos, large as they are, would fit inside either transport. But, 'how does anyone fit?' questions HaaHoo X. 'If you look closely at the Pinky-Ponk and Ninky-Nonk, the only ones who should be able to get aboard are the Pontipines. I'm sure with some clever use of perspective, they can make room for us as well'.

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Makka Pakka: 'Give me my own carriage'

Well-known stone artist and face-washer, Makka Pakka, staged a peaceful protest in the night garden this evening.  The protest was to draw attention to 'the need for more Ninky-Nonk carriages to be made available to residents'. During the protest, Pakka parked his Og-Pog in the path of the Ninky-Nonk as it took its journey around the night garden. The protest was largely unsuccessful as the Ninky-Nonk avoided Pakka and the Og-Pog by running up a tree.

Tombliboo carriage 'uncomfortable'
When interviewed by The Daily, Pakka explained that he felt it unfair that he was forced to share a carriage with three other passengers, Tombliboo Un, Oo and Ee. 'It's uncomfortable,' he told our reporter. 'The seats are not designed to fit my form and the seatbelts barely go around my middle. I'm also sick of seeing the Tombliboo pants fly off whenever the road gets a little rough'. While declining to place blame on other gardenites, Pakka pointed out that Iggle Piggle, a garden visitor, had his own carriage, which he frequently didn't use because he prefered to travel with Upsy Daisy. 'It's practically a spare carriage, that's all I'm saying,' he stated.

Other gardenites expressed sympathy for Makka Pakka's protest. 'We have to share our carriage with the Wottingers, so we know what it's like,' said Mr Pontipine, 'Can you imagine sixteen squealing children in that small space? Luckily the Wottingers don't seem to leave the house very often, and our children quite like to travel on the roof'.

Ninky-Nonk honchos: 'No new carriages'
When asked for their response, a representative of Ninky-Nonk-Inc stated that the Ninky-Nonk was currently carrying a full complement of carriages and there were no plans for new carriages in the near future. Pakka expressed fury at this response which he said was 'typical of the cold hearted corporation which runs the public transport system in the night garden'. He added that he would not be providing washing services for the Ninky-Nonk until his demands were met.

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Ninky-Nonk accessibility questioned

A public meeting was held today to discuss the accessibility of the night garden's public transport system. Residents raised concerns about the fact that neither the Ninky-Nonk nor Pinky-Ponk have designated stops for passengers to alight, and that the Ninky-Nonk is not easily accessible by handy-capable or pregnant residents.

'All of the carriages have stairs', explained one resident who preferred to remain anonymous, 'it makes it hard to get one's Og-Pog on board'. Upsy Daisy agreed that the flight of stairs needed to reach her carriage was long, but stated that 'it gives a great leg and bum workout'.

Smaller residents constantly miss transport
The teeny tiny Pontipines made a statement to the meeting that on many occasions they had simply been unable to catch either the Ninky-Nonk or Pinky-Ponk due to the lack of designated stops. 'We just can't catch the darn things', said Mrs Pontipine. 'I can see them stopping through my binoculars, but by the time we get there, they have gone'. The Wottingers made a similar statement.

Although residents voted in favour of converting the Ninky-Nonk steps into ramps and creating a network of stops to be used by both transport systems, no agreement was reached as to how to proceed. While the teeny tiny Pontipines offered their children as unpaid laborers, other residents were less obliging. 'My skills lie more in dancing and skipping than building ramps', stated Upsy Daisy.

Pinky-Ponk 'Unsanitary'?
Deferred for another meeting were questions about the hygiene standards in the Pinky-Ponk, which includes a beverage service as part of every flight. 'We want to be assured that the juice is fresh for each flight, and that the sippi cups have been thoroughly washed', said Tombliboo Un, who raised the item on the agenda. 'I love Pinky-Ponk juice, but not if it's crawling with bacteria'.

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